Scripture: John 13:34-35

Are you in the 30%? While precise figures vary depending on the survey, it’s estimated that only 30% of families eat dinner together regularly. Even for those who do eat together, with TV, phones, and other distractions, the average parent spends 38.5 minutes per week in meaningful conversation with their children. Getting together for most families just doesn’t happen.

With our grill-out and since summer is a natural time for Wisconsinites to get together, we’re breaking from our series on Galatians this morning to talk about community, growing to know and love each other.

Over the last decade the Golden State Warriors have been dominant in the NBA. A key to that is what the Golden State Warriors do when they aren’t playing basketball is unheard of in the NBA: They eat together. The Warriors actually go out to dinner together when they’re on the road, instead of trekking off on their own—like most players. They’ve made a habit out of huge team meals. Team dinners draw them together and you can see it on the court.

The Bible teaches that a vital part of a healthy church is community, yet it’s unusual to find a church committed to community. Jesus said: “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. By this all people will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another” (John 13:34-35). If we are going to be what Jesus desires us to be, we must have a firm grip on We are Family!

There are many reasons people attend a church. The number one reason they stay is a community.If you don’t have friends, if you don’t have family, brothers and sisters, when another church has a better preacher, program or praise team, you’ll jump ship.

God designed us for community. It’s impossible to live the Christian life successfully apart from the support of brothers and sisters in Christ. God didn’t create us as solo saints to struggle through on our own, listening to sermon podcasts, watching church over the internet. reading our Bibles and praying by ourselves. When you’re born, you’re born into a family, and when you’re born again, you’re born into your second family – the Church!”

You will never be the Christian God wants you to be, we will never be the church God wants us to be unless we have a firm grip on spiritual family. If spiritual family is commanded in Scripture, how can we return to a biblical worldview on spiritual family? If you’re taking notes…

1. Church family is God’s plan for the Christ-follower. 

In his book, The Connecting Church, Randy Frazee writes, “The experience of authentic community is one of the purposes God intends to be fulfilled by the church. The writings of Scripture lead one to conclude that God intends the church, not to be one more bolt on the wheel of activity in our lives, but the very hub at the center of one’s life.”  God designed us to have a…

Common Place. We were made for relationships. The church is God’s plan to satisfy this need in all of us. Periodically, someone will say, “I just worship at home watching church.” God created technology but it’s not His plan for normal church life. The Christian life is a relational, selfless life.

Did you know that the New Testament never commands us to join a church? Want to know why? It was so much a part of the New Testament church, it’s assumed. “Let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together…” (Hebrews 10:25).  The early church understood this. They spent time with each other; they did things together. Their lives were intertwined and interconnected.

Church isn’t a program or a time slot. Sometimes we get stuck in the thinking that church is a once-a-week, hour long commitment. It’s not. It’s relational. It’s family.

Common Ground. Acts 2:44, “All who believed were together and had all things in common.” What did those believers have in common? Everything. They weren’t clones. There’s tremendous diversity. If you read Acts 2, you’ll discover that the group who were saved and became the early church was made up of people from all over the known world. Each one brought their own personalities and culture. There was uniqueness, yet at the core of it all, there was common ground.

Our church is made up of unique individuals. Becoming a community doesn’t mean we lose that. We want your unique gifts and talents, your perspectives and viewpoints, personality quirks and sense of humor. Each of your individualities helps make us what we are as a church family.  

Yet, when there are different types of people, there’s always the potential for conflict. The early church was unified but as we read our New Testament, we see that conflict began to rear its ugly head.

In a church that’s not a community, conflict will rip it apart. The church that works through that and develops community is one that’s able to concentrate on what they have in common instead of differences. When we begin with a common ground, we can work through conflicts.

Common Story. If Jesus is your Savior, you and I have the same story. We’re sinners saved by grace. We deserved Hell and judgment. Our sin separated us from God. We fell so short of His holiness. That’s why Jesus died on the cross for us. When we cried out to Him and asked for forgiveness, we were born-again. We’re cleansed by the blood of Christ, sealed by the Spirit and have eternity with the Father to look forward to. We may be very different, but if you know Jesus, we have the same story.

Common Calling. When the Holy Spirit enters our life at salvation, we’re to put off the old nature and put on the new. We’re called to holiness and obedience. We’re called to begin that process of acting less and less like pagans and more like Jesus. Knowing we’re all called to the same thing, that we share that common calling to glorify God in our lives, helps us to encourage and be accountable to each other.

Common Goal. When we have Christ in common, we have a common goal. We have our focus on building up of His Kingdom. Many churches become sidetracked here. They get caught up in methods, style or programs. At Grace we’re here for three key reasons. 1) Exaltation– It’s number one. We’re here to glorify God. 2) Edification – We’re to become more like Jesus, building each other up in the faith. 3) Evangelization – We’re the only hope this world has. God has called us to be a spiritual Navy Seal rescue team to storm the gates of Hell, rescuing spiritual hostages from Satan the Terrorist. We’re the God Squad! We’re a spiritual assault team, empowered by the Spirit with Gods Word as our weaponry.

So why isn’t this happening? Why is the church in America often so impotent? There are many reasons. A primary one is we don’t have…

2. A biblical understanding of spiritual family as seen in commitment. 

A cunning dairy farmer was approached by a stranger and asked how much he thought his prize Jersey cow was worth. The farmer thought for a moment, looked the stranger over, then said: “Are you the tax assessor, or has she been killed by your car?”

The gospel must change our perspective. It’s to revolutionize our understanding of spiritual family commitment. Jesus challenges our notions of family. He said that we must not even let biological family come between us and following Him and genuine discipleship (Luke 14:26).

In Mark 3:33 Jesus asked a rhetorical question, “Who are my mother and my brothers?” This occasion was when Mary and His brothers had come for Him. He answered this by saying that it’s those that do God’s will who are His family, not necessarily His physical mother and brothers.
The point is that Jesus has called into being a new community, a new family of people committed to following Him. He chose the core of this community, the disciples, (Mark 3:13-19). In Galatians 6, Paul fleshes this out for us. Here we find some practical ways to flesh out spiritual family.  

When your brother or sister is down, restore them. If anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness (Galatians 6:1). Someone is tripped up by sin. The sin has come to light. Maybe he was caught spending the weekend with another woman. Her lie to her boss came out. His tax evasion was discovered. They’ve been exposed for being a trouble maker and causing division in the church.  

The word restore was used for setting a broken bone. If you’ve broken a bone, you know how painful it is. It’s why the work of spiritual restoration must be done gently. The thought is doing something tenderly and with enormous kindness.

When a friend is down, wrecked by sin, you don’t announce it or ruin a reputation. No, you go to their aid, doing what it takes to help the recovery.  

Restoring takes time and commitment. It’s work, hard work that must be done gently. It’s easier to point out sin in someone’s life than it is to help them get out of those same problems.

When your brother or sister is weak, carry them. “Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ” (Galatians 6:2). The word in the original for bear means to take up with the hands, to carry.

Two brothers worked together on the family farm. One was married and had a large family. The other was single. At the day’s end, the brothers shared everything equally – produce and profit. One day the single brother said to himself, “It’s not right that we should share equally the produce and the profit. I’m alone and my needs are simple.” So, each night he took a sack of grain from his bin and crept across the field between their houses, dumping it into his brother’s bin. Meanwhile, the married brother said to himself, “It’s not right that we should share the produce and the profit equally. After all, I’m married and have a wife and children to look after me in years to come. My brother has no one, and no one to take care of his future.” So, each night he took a sack of grain and dumped it into his single brother’s bin. Both men were puzzled for years because their supply of grain never dwindled. Then, one dark night the two brothers bumped into each other. Slowly it dawned on them what was happening. They dropped their sacks and embraced each other.

Bearing your brothers and sisters’ burdens shows how much you want to help. It’s vital for us to do that as brothers and sisters in Christ.

When your brother or sister teaches, bless them. Let the one who is taught the word share all good things with the one who teaches (Galatians 6:6). For years Jane and I sent a Christmas letter to Bob and Joyce Collins until the Lord called them Home. Periodically, Jane and I reach out to Dave and Barbara Hershberger. Bob Collins was my Sunday School teacher when I was a child. The Hershbergers were two of our professors in college. I am who I am today because others poured their lives into me. You are who you are because others poured their lives into you. Have you thanked them? Are you a blessing to them?

We have a nursery, Grace Kids, Amped, GSM leaders who work so that they can share God’s Word with our young people. Some of you were led to the Lord or you grew spiritually at some church years ago. Have you ever thanked that Pastor, that Sunday School teacher, that kid’s worker?

Christ-followers are people of gratitude. A pastor stood at the Vietnam Veterans Memorial and watched as a man in tears lay a wreath at the base of the memorial. The pastor put his hand on the man’s shoulder, and the man said, “Twenty-five years ago he stepped into the line of fire for me, the least I can do is say, ‘Thanks.’”

All of us receive instruction in the word from a variety of sources. The point is not where you receive the instruction but how you respond to it. If we want to reap a harvest of blessing, we must “share all good things” with those who instruct us in the things of the Lord. We owe a debt of love and gratitude. We owe a debt of encouragement and prayer.

When your brother or sister is needy, help them. “And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up. So then, as we have opportunity, let us do good to everyone, and especially to those who are of the household of faith” (Galatians 6:9-10).

One of my favorite NFL players was Walter Payton, Sweetness. He was one of the greatest running backs in NFL history. A mere 5’10,” 202 lbs., he set an all-time rushing record of 16,726 yards.

During his 12-year career, he carried the ball over nine miles. If you divide that number by the number of times he ran the ball, you’ll discover an amazing statistic: He was knocked down on average every 4.4 yards of those nine miles. He set the record because every time he was knocked down, he got up and ran the ball again. He kept getting up, getting up and getting up. Do you get tired of helping others? When you’re knocked down by discouragement, don’t stay down. Get up and get back in the game. Great victories await those with great endurance. Let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up.

This passage comes to a very practical end with a word of application: Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers. The word opportunity comes from the Greek word Kairos. It’s sometimes translated “time.” It refers to those moments in life when a door of opportunity opens before us and we have a choice to make. Will we go through that door, or hesitate until it closes? We all have opportunities to do good if we take them when they come. Every day there are moments when we can say a word of encouragement. There are times we can get involved in solving someone’s problem if we’ll invest the time.  We all have those kairos opportunities. Will we take them?

Opportunities come and go. A sculptor once showed his studio to a friend who spotted a strange statue. It was the figure of a man with hair covering his face and wings on each foot. “What’s the name of that statue?” he asked. The sculptor replied, “His name is Opportunity.” “Why is his face hidden?” “Because men seldom know when he comes to them.” “Why are there wings on his feet?” “Because he is soon gone and when he departs, he cannot be overtaken.” Please use the opportunities. How do we use them?  

Spontaneity. You can’t worship your schedule or to do list, and minister to others. You have to break the mold and be flexible. It wasn’t convenient for the Good Samaritan to be the Good Samaritan.

Availability. This is close to spontaneity. Those who have close spiritual relationships are ready, willing and eager…even just to offer the simple gift of their presence.

There was a time when “screen” was commonly understood to be a lightweight, meshed-wire door designed to let fresh air in and keep bugs out. For most of us, our screens keep our brothers and sisters out. How well do you know your brothers and sisters? Do you know their name? Burdens? How can you pray for them, if you know so little about them?

If we’re going to be what God has called us to be, it demands availability.  Too often we worship our watches and wallets. I can’t afford the money, and I don’t have time. We don’t understand family.

Frequency. Spontaneity and availability are a good start, but it takes time to truly know, care and love each other. It’s what we see in the book of Acts. This is a plug for our small groups. The early church gathered every day, we’re just encouraging you to come once or twice a week.

Hospitality. Did God give you your home? Is it a museum or a tool for Christ? There’s a major difference between entertaining and hospitality. Entertainment is seeking to impress people; hospitality is serving people. Do you use it as a place to serve and minister to others?

Confidentiality. Our church must be a safe place. We must know each other for that to happen. Unfortunately, fellowship in most churches means 5 or 10 minutes of shallow chit-chat. In many churches, it almost seems illegal to tell anyone you’re having a problem. The unwritten rule is you shouldn’t have a problem, and if you do, don’t talk about it at church.

Shouldn’t the church be one place we’re able to share be with those who can pray for us? We need each other! Howard Hendricks said, “You can impress people at a distance; you can only impact them up close. The general principle is this: the closer the personal relationship, the greater the potential for impact.”

People grow in relationships. In a relationship where there’s trust, vulnerability, willingness to admit need, request prayer and to explore growth, there can be the support needed to sustain that growth.

A biblical understanding of spiritual family, local church family is seen in commitment.Are you committed? Are you committed to the Lord? How about your brothers and sisters in this place, in this church family?

Conclusion

In a 1993 newspaper article, Boston Globe reporter, Sally Jacobs wrote the following:

“It can never be said that Adele Gaboury’s neighbors were less than responsible. When her front lawn grew hip-high, they had a local boy mow it down. When her pipes froze and burst, they had the water turned off. When the mail spilled out the front door, they called the police. The only thing they didn’t do was check to see if she was alive. She wasn’t.”

The report goes on to explain that police broke into the side door of Adele’s small blue house and found the seventy-three-year-old woman’s remains in her own kitchen. The medical examiner said she’d likely passed away from natural causes – four years before!

One of her neighbors said, “This never was a very friendly neighborhood.” Another long-time resident said, “People have their own lives. They go their own ways. Neighbors don’t want to get involved with neighbors.”

I’m not sure about neighborhoods; I do know about churches. The sad reality is that churches aren’t like they were 2000 years ago, but they’re supposed to be. It’s what Jesus created us for and commands us to be.

I don’t want to be just another church, do you? At Grace, we’re brothers and sisters. We were bought with the precious blood of God’s only Son. That means something! It must transform us.

Do you love Jesus? Then, you must love your brothers and sisters. Faith is never faith alone. Jesus said, By this all people will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another (John 13:35).

Based on that yardstick, that if you love Jesus, you’ll love other Christ-followers, would those who don’t know Jesus, think that you’re a Christian because of your love and care for other Christ-followers? Are we at Grace Church known in this community as a church that loves each other?