Scripture: Lamentations 3:19-27
When his wife, Martha, died in 1782, President Thomas Jefferson (picture) didn’t leave his room for three weeks, he was so overcome with grief. Some of us can relate to the depth of Jefferson’s loss. Sometimes the pain is so intense, we just feel like giving up.
Tomorrow is Memorial Day. It’s a federal holiday in the United States for honoring our U.S. military personnel who died while serving in the Armed Forces. Grief and mourning are not just for those who have lost a family member who was serving our country. Everyone of us has faced or will face grief. Today we’re breaking from our study of 2 Samuel and using Memorial Day, what our nation is remembering this week, to deal with some of life’s most pressing questions:
How do you deal with sorrow in your life? How do you cope with loss as a believer? How do you handle the emotions that accompany the loss of a job or a friendship, or of a loved one? Should our response as Christians be different from the response of those who do not know the Lord?
Turn to Lamentations 3:19-27 (p. 644). These verses in Lamentations teach us some valuable truths on how to deal with loss in our lives.
19 Remember my affliction and my wanderings,
the wormwood and the gall!
20 My soul continually remembers it
and is bowed down within me.
21 But this I call to mind,
and therefore I have hope:
22 The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases;
His mercies never come to an end;
23 they are new every morning;
great is Your faithfulness.
24 “The Lord is my portion,” says my soul
“therefore I will hope in Him.”
25 The Lord is good to those who wait for Him,
to the soul who seeks Him.
26 It is good that one should wait quietly
for the salvation of the Lord.
27 It is good for a man that he bear
the yoke in his youth.
The book of Lamentations contains a whole series of laments concerning the destruction of Jerusalem in 586 B.C. The author, most believe that it’s Jeremiah the prophet (picture), speaks for the whole nation of Israel. Throughout the book he details the many losses that the Israelites suffered in the destruction of Jerusalem. He writes of the unspeakable horrors of starvation and cruelty the people suffered in the siege leading up to the capture of the city. Once the Babylonians took the city, they ruthlessly killed people. They took the strongest and best survivors and dragged them off as slaves into exile. They ransacked the temple, broke down the city walls and left the city in ruins. Everything was stripped away.
What was even worse, the Israelites brought all this on themselves. They’d rebelled against God and defied his commands. They were responsible for the losses they suffered. God had promised them that if they obeyed Him, He would bless them, but disobey Him and it would cost them. The book of Lamentations was written in the aftermath of all this terrible sorrow and loss.
So, what do you do when you are faced with terrible loss in your life? How do you keep from drowning under it all? How do you keep the sorrow and troubles of the past from poisoning the present and obscuring the future? How do you find the hope to carry on? That’s what we want to look at with this passage in Lamentations this morning.
Let’s look first at verses 19-21. Here we find Jeremiah remembering all the sorrows that Israel had recently experienced. The more Jeremiah dwells on these sorrows, the more broken hearted he becomes. That leads us to the first truth we can learn from these verses. If you’re taking notes.
1. Dwelling on your sorrow will only increase your sorrow, vss. 19-21.
Please understand that does not mean that you shouldn’t express your sorrow. When you experience any kind of loss, it’s good and it’s right for you to express your sorrow.
For some reason we don’t always hear that in church. Some people teach that as Christians we should never be sad, that it’s somehow sinful to be sad, that a truly strong and victorious Christian would never be sad. And sometimes as believers we feel this pressure to put on a happy face and pretend that everything is okay even when it’s not. That’s not right, because it’s not honest. Read Paul’s letters in the New Testament and you’ll see that Paul didn’t mind sharing his struggles with others.
There are others who advocate a type of stoicism. Stoicism teaches that you shouldn’t express any emotion at all during times of loss. For Star Trek (picture) fans, it’s the Mr. Spock way of dealing with loss.
Stoicism says, “Just resign yourself to your fate. Don’t get upset, don’t complain. Simply accept whatever comes your way without any emotional response at all.”
As Christians we don’t believe in fate or karma. We believe in God. We believe that God is in control and that’s completely different.
While these ideas may sound good, they’re not biblical. God teaches us throughout the Bible that we may and should express our sorrow during times of trouble. Lamentations is a divinely inspired book expressing sorrow during times of great loss. In the book of Psalms, you’ll find example after example of people pouring out their hurts before the Lord.
The book of Romans tells us: “Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn.” (Romans 12:15). If you’re still not convinced, look at the example of Jesus. In John 11:35 we find that Jesus wept, expressing His sorrow at the loss of His friend Lazarus.
So, it’s good and right for you to express your sorrow. God gave us tear ducts for a reason. Cry when you need to, talk about it, pray about it, journal, talk to a friend, draw a picture, write a poem or a song. Whatever it takes, express your sorrow and grief. Let it out. So, we’re not talking about not expressing your sorrow, what we’re talking about is not dwelling on your sorrow. Expressing your sorrow is healthy. Dwelling on your sorrow is not. Dwelling on your sorrow will only increase your sorrow.
Dwelling on your sorrow will poison your life with bitterness, vs. 19.
How does it increase your sorrow? Verse 19: “I remember my affliction and my wandering, the wormwood and the gall.” Jeremiah is dealing with memories and uses four words to describe them: affliction, wandering, wormwood or bitterness and gall. Let’s look at each of them.
Affliction
The word for affliction can be translated “trouble” or “misery,” as in “Nobody knows the troubles I’ve seen.”
Wandering
The word for wandering refers to “restlessness.” It’s used elsewhere in the Old Testament of straying from the Lord.
Wormwood
It’s the word for bitterness, the poison “wormwood” or “hemlock.”
Gall
Refers to a bitter or poisonous herb.
Jeremiah is remembering all his miseries. He remembers his wanderings, his straying from the Lord. He’s partly responsible for his troubles and so he’s struggling with guilt here, too. The memories keep crashing in, poisoning him like a bitter root. Bitter memories are like poison. They poison your life and your relationships. They poison your relationship with God, with your family and with each other. Dwelling on your sorrow will only increase your sorrow by poisoning your life with bitterness.
Dwelling on your sorrow will eventually lead you to depression and despair, vs. 20.
“My soul continually remembers it and is bowed down within me.” As Jeremiah dwells on these bitter memories, he writes: “I well remember them, and my soul is downcast within me.”
This phrase “remember it” is an interesting one in the Hebrew. It’s actually the word “remember” used twice – “I remember remember them.” Some of us are so good at remembering the negatives in our life. We don’t just remember them; we twice remember them! In fact, we seem to remember them twice as much as anything else. When you twice remember your troubles, it will lead to depression. You can see that at the end of verse 20: “My soul is bowed down within me.”
The word bowed means literally “to sink or be weighed down.” Isn’t that an accurate description of depression? You’re weighed down by all of your troubles and start to sink beneath the load. Once you start sinking, you lose all sight of hope, and finally you give in to despair.
You could paraphrase verse 20: “I twice remember my sorrows, and sink into depression and despair.” Dwelling on your sorrow only increases your sorrow. It can poison your life with bitterness and eventually lead to depression and despair.
Dwelling on your sorrow cannot bring you hope, vs 21.
You can’t look up by looking down. You can’t find hope by dwelling on your troubles. Hope is the very opposite of despair. In order to find hope, you must arrive at a turning point. It’s what we find in verse 21. The author writes: “Yet this I call to mind, and therefore I have hope.”
The author doesn’t deny his sufferings. He doesn’t minimize them or try to rationalize them away. His losses are real, not imagined. He remembers them only too well. In fact, he twice remembers them! But now he makes a choice. He chooses not to dwell on them. He “calls to mind” or “chooses to remember” something else instead. And it is because he chooses to remember this “something else” that he has hope.
If you want to have hope, you must choose to remember this “something else.” It’s the biblical principle of replacement. You can’t just stop doing something. You must replace it with something better.
This “something else” or something better is what verse 21 points us towards – God’s faithfulness. Dwelling on your sorrow only increases your sorrow. Choosing to remember God’s faithfulness will bring you hope.
That’s the something else the author calls to mind. We’ll spend the rest of our time looking at verses 22-27 where we find a beautiful description of God’s faithfulness.
2. Choosing to remember God’s faithfulness will bring you hope, vss. 22-27.
The climax of the whole book of Lamentations actually comes at verse 23: “Great is Your faithfulness.”
God is not only faithful; His faithfulness is great. It’s perfect, infinite, overflowing, far beyond human faithfulness. Think of the most loyal, faithful friend you know, hopefully it’s not just your dog but a person. Anyway, their faithfulness cannot even begin to touch the faithfulness of God. When you choose to remember God’s faithfulness instead of dwelling on your sorrow, you will find hope instead of bitterness and despair.
It makes sense when you think about it. Because God has been faithful in the past, I can trust him with my present and the future as well. Because God is faithful, I have “strength for today and bright hope for tomorrow.” Verses 22-27 specifically emphasize two aspects of God’s great faithfulness. God is faithful in His great love for you and then God is faithful in His goodness to you.
God is faithful in His great love for you, vss. 22-24.
Verse 22 “It is because of the Lord’s great love that we are not consumed.” The word “love” here is the word hesed that we’ve talked so much about. It’s used for God’s covenant love to His people. It could even be translated “God’s faithful love.” In this particular verse the word for “love” is actually in the plural. You pick that up in some translations which speak here of God’s “mercies.” It’s the same word used in the plural in Psalm 89:1 – “I will sing of the mercies of the Lord forever.” It’s as if the word “love” in the singular is not enough to describe God’s great love for us. God’s love is so great it has to be in the plural!
“It is because of the Lord’s mercies, His great faithful love that we are not consumed.” That word consumed means “to be absolutely finished, to be at the end.” Ever been there? Felt like you’re at the end of your rope? The end of the road? Like you’ve got nothing left to give? That’s what the word “consumed” means. Verse 22 says that because of God’s great love you are not consumed, you are not finished, you are not at the end.
Why? Look at the end of verse 22 – “for His compassions never fail.” The word “compassion” is a beautiful word in the Hebrew. In Hebrew it is literally the word “womb.” So, verse 22 speaks of God’s love towards us in terms of the tender, compassionate love that a mother has for her child that she carries in the womb. This is part of the breathtaking beauty of our God: His power, His might, His strength, His stern and absolute justice, and yet at the same time His tender and compassionate love for His children. This word is also used in the plural – “his compassions” – to emphasize further God’s wonderful, tender compassion and mercies.
“His compassions never fail.” This phrase “never fail” has a very similar meaning to the word “consumed.” It means “to be finished, to be completed, to be at an end.” So, when you take all of verse 22 together, it teaches us a very precious truth. You may feel like you’re at your end, but you’re not finished, because God is not finished. You can never say, “I’m done, I quit!” because God is never done, and God will never quit. He is always there for you! You will not fail, because His compassions never fail. And therefore, you have hope.
God’s compassions are new every morning, vs. 23.
Not only do God’s compassions never fail. They are renewed for us daily. Verse 23: “They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness!” God’s mercies are fresh and new every morning. God never serves you leftovers. His compassions never grow tired or stale. He has fresh, new, tender love and compassion for you every day of the week. His love is as certain as the sunrise. Each day when you wake up, look outside and see if the sun came up. If it did, then you know that God’s compassions are new for you each day. Every new morning is a sign of God’s faithfulness and grace.
The changing of the days, the changing of the seasons all testify to God’s “great faithfulness, mercy and love.” It’s like that hymn: “summer and winter, springtime and harvest,” all testify to God’s faithfulness. Every new day is a reminder of God’s faithful love: God’s compassions never fail; they are new every morning.
God is what you’re waiting for, vs. 24.
Because of God’s faithful love, the author can say in verse 24: “I say to myself, ‘The LORD is my portion; therefore I will wait for Him.’” What’s your portion? It’s whatever you’re waiting for. So, what are you waiting for this morning? Are you waiting for a windfall? An inheritance? A change in your circumstances? For whatever is causing your sorrow to go away?
Or are you waiting for the Lord? Let me encourage you this morning. Make God your portion. Wait for Him. His compassions never fail. They’re new every morning. God is faithful in His great love for you.
God is faithful in His goodness to you, vss. 25-27.
In the original Hebrew all three of these verses begin with the same word – the word “good.” These verses share with us three ways that God is faithful in His goodness, and because He is good to you, you must learn to trust Him.
Learn to trust God’s character.
Verse 25: “The LORD is good to those whose hope is in Him, to the one who seeks Him.” The Lord is good. Don’t let anyone tell you differently. God is good through and through.
Thomas Brooks (picture), an old Puritan put it this way: “God, in that He is good, can give nothing, nor do nothing, but that which is good.” Learn to trust God’s character, even when things don’t seem to be going according to your plans.
Thomas Watson (picture), another Puritan says this: “If it is good for us, we shall have it; if it is not good for us, then the withholding of it is good.” Why? Because God is good! All the time! Learn to trust God’s character.
Learn to trust God’s timing.
Verse 26: “It is good that one should wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord.” The word “salvation” here is a word that can mean “salvation or deliverance.” It often refers to salvation from sin but can mean deliverance from anything – from sickness, from enemies, or from whatever may be causing sorrow. We always want deliverance now, immediately. God wants us to learn patience and trust.
It’s vital that we learn to trust God’s timing. God’s timing is always the best. He is never early, never late, He’s always on time. Yet I’ve got to admit that I sometimes find myself asking, “Lord, couldn’t you be early just once in a while?” Learn to trust God’s timing instead of yours.
Learn to trust God’s discipline, vs. 27.
Learn to trust God’s character, learn to trust God’s timing, and finally, learn to trust God’s discipline. Verse 27: “It is good for a man that he bear the yoke in his youth.” To bear the yoke is to learn submission to God even during the hard times. God uses the difficult times in your life for good to make you strong in Him. It is part of His discipline in your life.
Discipline isn’t punishment for sin. Rather, God’s discipline is His training process for us, much as a coach trains a team. No one is exempt.
The book of Hebrews says that God’s discipline is one of the proofs that you’re His child. Discipline always comes through adversity. God is strengthening your character and teaching you to trust Him through the hard times in your life.
The word “man” is not the usual word for man in Hebrew. It’s a word which means “a strong or a mighty man, a warrior.” Or if you were to apply it to a woman, it could mean a strong woman or warrior, you know, like Katniss Everdeen (picture) or Joan of Arc (picture). How do you become a strong man of God or a strong woman of God? You have to bear the yoke while you’re young. You undergo discipline and training.
Don’t fight God during the hard times. God is being faithful in His goodness to you. Learn to trust God’s character. Learn to trust His timing. Learn to trust God’s discipline.
Conclusion
Historian Ken Burns (picture) noted that when Thomas Jefferson’s wife passed away, he “never could come to terms with grief.” Jefferson believed in an impersonal God who created the world but then withdrew, never caring about His creation. But Jeremiah writes, the same God who created the world, cares about its every detail. When we find ourselves enduring unbearable pain, we’re not alone. God is right there with us. He’s a faithful God.
So, what does this passage teach us? Dwelling on your sorrow increases your sorrow, but choosing to remember God’s faithfulness brings hope.
As we tie this up, let me encourage you to choose to remember God’s faithfulness. God is faithful in His great love for you: His compassions never fail; they’re new every morning. God is faithful in His goodness to you: learn to trust His character, His timing and His discipline in your life. And then, even in the midst of life’s most difficult trials, you will find hope in God. Great is Your faithfulness, O Lord!